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12/26/2013

4 Helpful Ways To Help Stop Bullying

Stop Bullying
Bullying! Bullying!! Bullying!!!
Do you wanna know how to stop this?
If Yes, then this article is for YOU only.
Make sure you read from start to the end...

Bullying  is always a serious issue, every parent must be fully prepared for it because its a normal and natural occurrence,is part of our nature and get this...it's not our fault or the child's fault,if they get bullied, we should acknowledge this!



Bullying in my own view as just only 3 (three) types,we have;
  •  The Physical Bullying
  •  The Verbal Bullying and
  •  The Cyber Bullying
Both can be done either by an individual(a kid) or a group(a gang of kids). I so much believe that kids who involve in bullying others are troubled ones,they kids who are facing a lot of troubles at home,which they can't handle,some have bottled up a lot of pains from what they've gone through and this have affected their emotions. So in order to express their feelings,share,mingle and to create awareness among their fellows is kinda difficult for them,instead of being positive they go negative with others. This is another parenting issue on is own.
Actions such as,picking on a fellow,demeaning,shoving,pushing etc are done in various places especially in schools and in the neighborhood where no adult sees it...this is what makes bullying a hard issue to tackle. Yet you must tackle it!  

Most parent, do use this Traditional Method to stop bullying,traditional methods such as;
  •  Telling Your kids To Never Mind Or Ignore Bullying,
  • Fighting Or Hit Back Bullying, and
  • Challenging the kid that bullied or their parent.
 Truly this methods do work but it does live a mark in a little kid's life for God knows how long!
  Imagine, a kid who as been trained on how to ignore bullying and not to worry about it...and such kids will keep on going through this pains and hurt from his or her fellow. Or a child who as been trained on how fight back whenever he/she is been bullied. Or you do help your kids fight back and challenge the kid who bullied or their parent...what do you think both kids will become?
What kinda atmosphere do you think you are creating for your kid and yourself?
To me, both kids will arbor pains in themselves,including you...The ignoring bully kid might one day commit suicide when it's too much while The fight back kid, will definitely become a bully too (because of too much aggression in defense whenever been bullied). And for the involving parent,who do challenge the kid that bullied or their parent, this might create a strong lasting enmity between your kid and the other kid even between you parents too!
So,I don't use this methods...will you?

Here Are 4 Helpful Ways To Stop Bullying
  • Respond To Your Child's Feelings: If your child is being bullied,let your child know that you do care about their feelings and value their life as well. This alone,will give your child hope and even courage for solution because they have someone they can rely on,someone who they can share what they feel in the inside with...teenagers wants to know that they've being heard and that their feelings matter but this depends on the kind of Parent-Child relationship you've built.This will then bring up the step of what you both will do to stop the bullying.
  • Report To The Authorities: Here after responding to your child's feelings, you have to do something...so,go ahead and prove it to them that you care and value them...Take note of caution, don't do this with anger or aggressiveness because it will send a wrong message to your child and it will not help stop the bullying but make it worse!Approaching the Authorities (I mean School authorities or the other parent directly) should be done in a very mature way. The way you approach really matters,when you approach some people while you're angry, you might inflict them with it and this will bring more problem. Try as best as you can to ease you anger and pain on what had happen to your child. Though, is gonna be easy...just keep your sanity!(Responding to your child's feelings and reporting to the authorities are actions you must take) 
  • Teach Your kid To Stand Up For Themselves: The reason why most kid get bullied is For Being Different. So,teach them these;
  1.  To look naturally confident and self-assured,
  2. Have good self-esteem,
  3.  How to care about their appearance ( to be well presented) and
  4.  How to use eye contact.
 I assure this will help them a lot!
  •  Empower them-(Positive Peer Group): To me, this is very helpful when you're not around or far away. It's also a very helpful tool to stop bullying for care givers such as, Teachers,Proprietors etc.At times,when you report to schools authorities about bullying you find out it doesn't stop,don't blame them bullying reports is just too much. In fact,most schools don't permit kids to fight back or defend themselves when bullied.
So,teach or empower them to stop bullying themselves. How you ask?
It's simple,just tell them to work/walk in group...its like having or creating a PRIDE OF TEENAGERS not PRIDE OF LIONS.
Encourage,motivate and challenge them on this group thing...it's gonna be difficult for bullying to occur!
(Teaching your kid/s how to stand up for themselves and empowering them are ways to boost your child self esteem)

Do you have any other ways to help stop bullying?
If you do...please share/post here.

12/03/2013

Stages Where Patience And Perseverance Must Be Exercised In Parenting

Stages You Need Patience

"Patience is BITTER,but it's fruit is SWEET" - Aristotle. Parenting requires you to persevere and have patients which is kind of bitter to do a SUCCESSFUL PARENTING JOB which will be sweetest at the end.Going through child rearing duti"es and responsibilities right from childbirth and training them through each development stage could be so hectic that most parent lose their patience and perseverance which are very necessary. As a parent,when you lose yours,your child looses his or hers too... then it becomes a war in this parenting field. This article lay more emphasis on these questions such as;
What is Patience? 
What is Perseverance? 
In what ways do parent make this mistake often? How do we exercise and also help how to children to exercise them too? 
What is PATIENCE? 
Patience is the capacity or ability to endure something tedious such as provocation,annoyance,pains and misfortunes without complaint but with calm and strength.
What is PERSEVERANCE?
Perseverance is that quality of continuing in something even if it is difficult. It is having this tenacious mindset of not giving up. Looking at this definition, I feel both words are interwoven a bit. But they are not the same,yet very much alike... especially when it comes to parenting. As a parent, try to remember when you were pregnant with your baby. You and your partner waited patiently for the appointed time. You waited patiently for the fetus to form in the womb,you waited and allowed the baby to grow properly in the womb,you also waited patiently for the expected day of delivery.
Why do you preserved,endured and waited with such patience?
 Because you don't want to have a premature or Mal-adjusted baby. Right?
But after delivery, the sweetness of our patients and perseverance do feel our heart that we never thought and even choose to forget how many months or years we've waited. This I'd say is the first stage we all do PASS when it comes to patience and perseverance in parenting. As a parent, do you exercise patience and persevere as your child totters towards maturity? Dear parent, for you to be successful in this parenting job you are in, PATIENCE and PERSEVERANCE had to be CONSIDERED. So,adding more effort to the kind of patience and perseverance we have earlier when we are trying to have the baby must be pursued. As our child totters towards maturity there are lots of duties of child-rearing but am sure most parents can relate to some such as; Learning to walk,toilet training,trying that first set of shoes,learning to read or home schooling and much more,exercising patience and perseverance will take you through all this.
In what ways do parent make this mistake often?
How do we exercise and also help our children to exercise them too?
Truly child training must begin early but we have to be careful,most parent are known to hurry and get so impatient with their child 's development emotionally, physically, intellectually, spiritually and socially. Most children, whose parent didn't exercise patience in their up bringing may seems to cope but somewhere,somehow, they will suffer some serious setbacks.
  1. PHYSICAL,EMOTIONAL,INTELLECTUAL AND SOCIAL: Patience and perseverance in children's physical,emotional,intellectual and social growth must also be considered as they develop. As a parent you must carefully study your kid to know what approach is best, cherish them,teach and correct them along these lines of development, your teaching and training have to be relevant to their age and developmental stage. There are parents who are known to rush teachings and disciplines on their children so they can act mature and well discipline quickly using means such as scolding,spanking and other kind of punishment all in the name of discipline. Inserting teachings,instructions and disciplines into children takes time,they may adapt to some quickly but because of their fallible and naive nature you will find them making the same mistake over and over,after repeated corrections,this could be so frustrating but here is where patience and perseverance is needed... this will make you an ideal teacher, they may learn from you,learn on their own or from people around them,just humble yourself,love and honor them because they human too,don't seek to control them and try not to lose it! They are also parents who are known to rush their children through schools(even cutting corners sometimes) so they can get to higher institutions quickly, "this often has negative consequences" says an expert educationist. Proof of this lies in the disturbing number of underage undergraduates in tertiary institutions who continue to fall prey to all kinds of evil influences and frustrating challenges because they are neither mentally nor emotionally mature enough to deal with experiences they are being expose to.
  2. SPIRITUAL: Patience and perseverance is also necessary in the spiritual development of children. On this aspect, parents shouldn't attempt to intimidate or force them to be religious,because it will not last,teaching your child to build relationship with God has to be patiently nurtured, not forcefully imposed. Some children do feel excessively pressurized and over sermon by their parents may even choose to dare their impatient parents by doing exactly what will annoy them and some will only pretend to be what you want them to be.So as a parent you should patiently guide and teach your child to his or her own personal commitment to God,praying ceaselessly for them (God's intervention) will help a lot!
      In the mean time feel free to make or give comment on this issue...

7/16/2013

Three Good Answers To Spanking Issues That Borders You

Spanking


When it comes to child discipline is spanking an effective and valuable tool?
Will spanking make our children behave better?
These are some the questions been asked by parents about this form of punishment (spanking) and i believe they are more of this questions.Being a parent make sure you read this article from the start to end, i assure it will give you more insight about spanking.Read this spanking article too.

Imagine this scenario:When a child misbehave, and the parent watch their child and longs to whack the child but didn't due to some "non-spanking" articles or book such parent reads.I would say this is completely wrong and an unrealistic approach...is better to give that child a quick swat on the butt,clear the air and the two of you can start over.As human beings,we all are fallible and because of our fallibility,we do make mistakes or do wrongs.This shows that we are not 100 percent perfect...children being young and naive do make mistakes which makes parents become impatient and lose their temper,this is natural but it would be much better if parent are in control...i mean to be patient when they(children) do wrongs.I want to emphasise here that occasional use of spanking is a very poor and ineffective method of discipline.My position here is far different from that of the parents who use spanking as the only discipline tool to keep their children in line.

Spanking Worries
Your Choice: As a parent you might be thinking that am not in the right place to tell or show how to raise up your child...you're right! we all are raised by different parents groomed or instilled with different teachings or discipline.So,you may decide to use spanking or not to use it at all...but reading this article to end will answers and covers all or some about spanking and also give you more answers and that covers all or some about spanking.

Spanking Stings: I call this statistics or researches below stings because this are it's effect on children...when you use spanking as your only discipline tool,when you use it occasionally or the at the slightest mistake your child made.Research has shown that the more children are spanked, the more likely it is that children will;
engage in antisocial behaviour, such as lying, stealing, cheating, bullying, assaulting a sibling or peers,act aggressively toward others,
develop mental health problems, such as depression and suicidality,
have a less close relationship with their parents.
Spanking being a harsh physical punishment is also associated with increased odds of mood disorders, anxiety disorders, alcohol and drug abuse/dependence, and several personality disorders." studies show that more physical punishment is associated with more aggressiveness.So,occasional use of spanking is not effective and valuable,it will make parenting ugly. 

You Need More Maturity:When it comes to spanking,i know you are trying to put our children on the right path,you are trying to make your children's mind but most you loose our mind?
Parent should understand that it's normal and natural,children will frustrate and get on your nerves.Parents have to accept this,we can't stop them from it only to change them,but you have to keep calm,exercise patience and stay sane to do so.This is maturity! 

You Need To Stay Sane:Though we are humans too,but loosing your temper when they misbehave will only make you a loser,because you will only make things worst.Loosing your temper,you may shout,smack or spank your kid...doing this you are effectively sanctioning their angry response.You are telling them is okay to lose control and be aggressive.When you spank them a lot,you will damage them emotionally and you may turn them into bullies and it will also damage the parent-child relationship and it won't help their future relationship with others as they grow up.

You Need To Apologise At Times:We parent are humans and it's normal and natural that we make this mistake of shouting at them and hitting them.At this moment,we need to clear the air and make up with our kid.Though,it may not be easy...you may think "am the parent and he or she is the kid at fault,so why should i apologise?" being a parent,we need humility in this job,what we do is what our child we that after.Kids are humans,they have emotions too...they deserve to hear the word "i am sorry" it softens the heart, and cleanse the offender of wrong.

 In the mean time feel free to comment or share your thought.

6/08/2013

Seven Steps To Better Parenting

Steps To Better Parenting
   Parenting is the one of the most important lifetime responsibility a person will ever have, and it's mistakes can have lifelong consequences on both the parent and the child.Though we parent are not perfect,we do or can make mistakes but making a lifelong mistake in this job shouldn't be a choice...so as a parent, this articles is a sure guide...it's the 7 things you must follow or do in this parenting job.It will help you to become a better parent...i assure

CREATE A LOVING HOME:
 Living in this loveless, selfish world strains family bonds. Married couples may find that the financial and emotional demands of raising children make existing marital problems escalate. For example, differences in opinion between a married couple on how to discipline and reward the children may increase tension between two people who already find it difficult to communicate.
The solution to this are:
- Plan regular time together as a family.
-Keep the romance in your marriage by regularly expressing affection for each other.
-Rather than constantly "finding fault", look for ways each day to praise your spouse.
-Tell your children that you love them; i have found that children are a bit like some flowers, just as these little plants turn towards the sun to receive light and warmth, children look to their parents for love and for reassurance that they are valued members of the family.

TEACH BY EXAMPLE:
 Action teach. Words often impart only information, such as, parents may tell their children to be respectful and speak the truth. However, if these same parents scream at each other and tell lies to excuse themselves from inconvenient obligations, they teach that this is how adults should behave. Copying parents is "one of the most powerful ways that children learn"

ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR CHILD'S FEELINGS:
 Children want and need the most important person in their lives....their parents, to know how they feel. If parents habitually contradict their children when such feelings are expressed, the children will be less likely to open up to them and may even start to doubt their ability to feel and think for themselves.Children as well as adults are far more likely to accept counsel if they feel that the one offering it truly understand them and the difficulties they face.

 EXERCISE YOUR AUTHORITY:
 Studies show that "children brought up by loving but authoritative parents- those who are supportive of their children, yet maintain firm limits- excel academically, develop better social skills, feel good about themselves and are happier overall than kids whose parents are either too lenient or excessively harsh"(parent magazine).
All the way from babyhood through their teen years, children will challenge your right to exert authority over them. Children are quick to learn when their parents are afraid to assert their authority and can be relied upon to give in. John Rosemond says..."when it comes to a question of 'who's the boss?' if parents wont run with the ball, children will"
Do not worry that you will alienate your children or crush their spirit if you exercise your authority, you can exercise your authority without becoming a tyrant, by being firm and loving.

DEFINE FAMILY RULES AND ENFORCE THEM PROMPTLY:
 Ronald Simons says, "kids fare better with clear rules and firm consequences, without structure, children become self-absorbed, selfish and unhappy..........and they make everyone around them miserable too". Defining reasonable limits for your children's behavior and enforcing those limits takes time, effort and perseverance, and children seem to have a natural urge to test any such boundaries. "Children are small people with their own minds and desires and an inborn tendency to sin.
Therefore, why not make a written short list of the household laws, or rules, that you feel your children must obey, which are less difficult to enforce and most likely to be remembered, next to the rules, write down the consequences for breaking them, make sure the punishment are reasonable and that you are willing to enforce them. If the rules are broken, enforce the consequences quickly, doing so in a calm, firm and consistent manner.
NOTE:if you are angry, wait till you calm down before you administer any discipline.
 

ESTABLISH AND MAINTAIN ROUTINES:
 Routine are a major part of adult life. Work and recreation usually follow set routines. Parents handicap their children if they do not teach them to structure their time and to stick to a schedule. On the other hand, "studies show that having rules and structure makes a child safe, secure and teaches self control and self-reliance"...says Dr Laurence Steinberg.

 SEEK GOOD ADVICE:
 Everyone seems to have advice on raising children. In the past, new parents relied on their parents' example or on their religious conviction to guide them, but in a number of lands, the family unit is decaying and religion has lost its influence. As a result, many parents turn to professional parenting experts for advice. Some of what these experts say is based on sound principles, and some may be considered contradictory or out-of-date, so its advised to seek the advice on the holy word of God(both Bible and Quran). Therein, you know more about how to raise children. They contain both direct advise and practical examples that can help you become a better parent and pray too.Am not against/discouraging you from visiting professional parenting experts, in fact read their books but what am emphasizing on is that you should be able to listen or receive guides on how raise your child/ren from the one(God) who give them(kids) to you.

I believe this 7  is will help you...in time feel free to comment and share your thoughts


6/01/2013

5 Effects Of Punishment In Parenting When Used As The Only Discipline tool

Effect Of Punishment In Parenting
Although,parents do try to use good discipline strategies,but the problem is,most parent try to deal with child misbehaviour by the use of punishment only...use it as the only discipline tool. They don't know how to handle child misbehaviour, some take discipline for punishment.
So far, we have talked about discipline, which is teaching and in my previous articles we've talked about good teaching strategies.

To go ahead, parents need to make a clear-cut distinction between discipline and punishment. In this article, we base only on punishment- I mean it's effect on a child.
Firstly, what is punishment?
Secondly, when and how do we use punishment in discipline?
Lastly, what effect or power does it have in child discipline?

What is punishment?: It is a very poor and ineffective tool that doesn't teach or motivate a child towards more desirable behaviour, it only curb undesirable behaviour.
The types of punishment: Listing out the types, I want parents to analyse, visualise and remember this punishments- I mean how do they feel when it 's done to you then?
Lecturing,
Scolding,
Sending the child to his room,
Taking away the child's privileges and,
Spanking.

Ask questions like, does it motivate me to change my negative behaviour back then in my childhood?

Does it influence that negative act or the misbehaviour?

The Effect Of Punishment: Firstly, punishment only curb undesirable behaviour, it only tells a child what not to do,, it doesn't motivate the child.
Secondly, parent intends the punishment to make things unpleasant for the child, so that he will change his behaviour for better. Unfortunately, it strengthened the very undesirable behaviour the parent wants to get rid of!
Thirdly, punishment loses its effectiveness as the child grows older. You find them say some things like: " Have done wrong again, I will be punish for this. Well, it doesn't kill any way, am ready for it!"
Fourthly, the person who punishes is teaching the child or others to avoid him. How can you impact or influence the child's life positively?
Fifthly, punishment reduces or make the child to lack confidence as they grow up and this differentiate the child from any other in the society.Its like putting the child in a lonely or different world
Lastly, what punishment does produce between parent-child relationship, is resentment, hostility, the wish for revenge or retaliation. It arouses negative feelings between parents and the child and we cannot teach our children a desirable behaviour with punishment only.
Parents need to make a clear-cut distinction between discipline and punishment. In this article,am emphasising that,parent shouldn't use punishment as the main and only discipline tool. 

In the mean time, feel free to comment and share your thoughts

5/30/2013

Reasons You Should Not Use Spanking As The Only Discipline Tool As A Parent

Don't Use Spanking Only


  Spanking is a form of punishment, when it comes to child discipline or parenting. By spanking, I mean a few good swats with your hand on the child bottom.
Don't Use Spanking Only
  Some psychiatrists and psychologists have stated it explicitly that no parent should ever spank a child. I think this is nonsense. This comment or reading one of those "Non Spanking books" as hold the grim will power of parents not to spank the misbehaving child. This is completely wrong, it's an unrealistic approach. It's far better for parents to give the child a few quick swats and clear the air. Then the parent and the child can start over again.
       To parents, whom spanking is the only discipline tool they know to keep their children in line, I want to emphasize that spanking is a very poor and ineffective method of teaching a child. If you use a very good discipline strategies, there will be very few times when you are so frustrated that you will have the emotional need to spank.

Reasons You Shouldn't Use Spanking as the only discipline tool:

Since spanking is a form of punishment, it suffers from all psychological drawbacks that go with any form of punishment, that is, it strengthened the particular undesirable behavior you are trying to correct.
Spanking, like other forms of punishment, is useless as the child gets older, say from Ten upwards. Who ever is going to spank a teenager must be a good wrestler( And this cannot prevent the teenager from running away from home after being spanked).
Whenever we spank a child we are teaching the child to hate us, fight us, and avoid us. How can we teach our child if we have taught him to hate us, avoid us?.
Further more, some kind of spanking arouses a deep desire for revenge and retaliation. I can vividly recall the night my father whipped and wrestled with me. I will never forget how I hated him at those times, felt like running away and vowed for revenge. All because I didn't attend an evening church service. I even spit out the words for revenge that night to a man who went back to report to my father, which landed me into the den of hard spanking.
The tragedy is that so many parents simply accept spanking as their main means of discipline. That is truly sad. These parents do not see how ineffective and harmful a constant diet of spanking is to parent-child relationship. They do not realize what a vastly different youngster they would have around and how enormously more satisfying their relationships would be if they used a creative and humanistic discipline strategies or techniques. You will only have few times to spank.
Finally, there is this kind of uncontrollable action that leads you to spank - This kind that results from something other than child misbehaviour. You spanked your child, but afterwards you realized the child didn't deserve it. Perhaps you were having a fight or quarrel, argument or disagreement with some one or maybe all you went through at work and you took it out on your child. When you realized this, Please go to the child, explained what had happened to you and apologize for what you've done, it does wonderful thing for the child.
In the mean time, feel free to comment and share your thoughts

5/24/2013

4 Single Parenting Tips For Raising Kids Alone

Single Dad
Single Mum

Parenting is one of the most joyous things that can happen to you in life but to most people, it's the other way round. I believe parenting is a job on is own... So, is a complex skill that needs to be learned, most people have no knowledge or training in this skill and that is what makes it hard for them, most especially parent in an intact family.If most parent in an intact family complains parenting is hard and tough, than single parenting will be much more harder and tougher.If parenting in an intact family is like hiking up a mountain trail, than single parenting is like hiking up that same mountain trail with a fifty-pound pack on your shoulders. It will be a very hard task!
Are you a single parent, who needs guides to become a successful parent?
If Yes, this article is for you.
Talking about SINGLE PARENT... If you are a widower or widow, divorced mother or father or your spouse is away on business a great deal or in service for long periods of time or is suffering from a lengthy illness, you are a SINGLE PARENT.
FREE YOURSELF FROM THIS BELIEVE
 Most people believed that parents from intact homes are the one that do a good job in raising their children and parents from broken homes produce children who have psychological difficulties. You should throw away this believe or idea and free yourself from it... As a single parent you can even do better than parents from intact home.
DEAL WITH PSYCHOLOGICAL STRESS
 The first thing you must do to become a good single parent is to deal with your PSYCHOLOGICAL STRESS. Researchers on psychological stress have concluded that the loss of a spouse through death or divorce is the most stressful event that can happen to us, you have to deal with that over whelming sense of personal loss. You have to take care of the inside you, let out all the pains, suffering, anger, wounds and loneliness, so you will be able to concentrate on your children. Bottling up all this inside you for a long-time may come out in ways that will make you want to hurt others around you, even your children is not left out.
GET EMOTIONAL SUPPORT 
 You may feel inadequate about raising your own child, feel guilty for your spouse death or the death of your marriage(divorce).Feelings like this might succour as a SINGLE PARENT So, including the inside of you that is lonely, hurt, wounded and angry is in desperate need of emotional support.
The wisest thing to do to help let out and overcome these negative feels is to get professional counselling-spend on therapy for yourself, build a new emotional support for yourself by joining groups or forum of single parents, mingling with parents who aren't single will only bring more emotional problems. You can also help yourself too by getting your feelings out in a way you find satisfying, but in a primitive way like; crying, screaming, shouting, beating or hitting the bed with pillow. Etc. Just allow yourself to express and experience the psychological pains you felt in reaction to your loss, will be a great help.
TIME - OUT YOURSELF
 Taking time off or out of parenting as a single parent is another great help. You've got lots of burdens from what you are going through, you feel exhausted and frustrated, in fact your children might even add to it with their own behaviours... You really to calm yourself down, do your grief work this will help you calm down, feel refreshed to do a better parenting job and handling your children's feelings too.
I BELIEVE THESE WILL HELP YOU!
 In the mean time, feel free to comment and share your thoughts

Parent-Child Relationship: How To Building The Special Bond


Many parents believed parenting is a very difficult job most especially single parents, they so much believe in this myth,
"Humans or children are the most difficult to control, lead or change"

Are they right?
 
Truly,children are in experience humans who are bound to make mistakes in every stage of their life from childhood to adulthood and as parent we are to correct them when they make mistakes,we are to educate and instil good morals and ethics into them too.
 
    Get this...i will agree with you on this, children as human are not perfect because when they make mistakes and you correct them, you may find them making the same mistakes again and again, this infuriates!  This makes parenting hard and tough at times...truly,parenting is much harder than anyone says and its far more emotionally charged.So, parenting been emotionally charge requires connecting with your child emotionally, that is building a special bond with your child...have good parent-child relationship.
   This is the surest,easy and best way to know your children's gene,personality and temperament in other to know how to bring them up,to help them find and recognize their strength and individuality.
"Laying down solid parenting roots will help you do a good parenting job"
As parent here are good steps to follow to build a good parent-child relationship;

SPEND MORE TIME WITH THEM
 "60% of abused children in the U.S were the victims of physical,emotional and educational neglect "
As parent, spending more time with your children is very important...the more you know or move close to your child,the higher the chances you have to influence his or her life.While spending time with them you should,
COMMUNICATE(dialogue)WITH THEM
 "single fathers often do not communicate with their children as well as do single mothers,which leads to children of single-parent households being more likely to use marijuana,alcohol and other illicit drugs and to have sex at an earlier age"
"parents in two-parent families spend an average of 2 hours a day interacting with their children compared to only 50 minutes for single -parent families"
As Parent,you should be a good communicator and a listener...reason,talk and dialogue with them, in fact let them know was going on and ask for their views,it will make them feel included and valued.Ask them questions and challenge their ideas in a friendly and pleasant way...this a technique for teaching children how to think for themselves,"Communication means moving what's in your mind easily and directly into the mind of the recipient" - Arch Lustberg
 you have to
TOUCH AND CARE FOR THEM
 "98% of mothers and 90% of fathers hugged their children ages 0 to 2 years of age daily,compared to only 74% of mothers and 50% of fathers who hugged their children ages 10 to 12 years of age daily"
When it comes to relationship, especially parent-child relationship touch plays a critical role, in parent-child relationship touch is the first language we learn, it's a channel of communication and bonding, it's a secret language and weapon for a successful relationship for parents.When it comes to touch, you can express what you feel,impact and interpret emotional content via touch.So, parents shouldn't drop or neglect this skills most especially mothers.Mother's touch are very powerful,touch increase the speed of communication and when it comes to bonding, it makes people feel more connected to you,use it to connect with them and
HUMILITY(PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES)
 Parent-child relationship deals with emotion, as parent we have to connect  with our children so we can impact into them.You need to humble yourself,put yourself in their shoe...see things from their point of view and treat them with respect.Humility and patience is the clue here,don't make your children feel that you are ignoring them,disregarding their feelings,that you don't care if your decision upset them this will make them awkward to deal with.
CLEAR OFF
 We parents are humans and we are not perfect...we may loose our temper when they(children) make mistakes or disobey,make sure you clear off and start afresh again...i mean apologise and let them know why you reacted that way and let the child understand its wrong(dialogue with your child)

I believe this steps will help you parents out there to build the bond you need...

In the mean time, feel free to comment and share your thoughts.

5/12/2013

Happy Mother's Day To All Mums Around The World!

 
Happy Mother's Day!


   Motherhood is a tough job, you're on call 24/7, no vacation leave or sick leave, often unappreciated, yet resignation is impossible. Why because motherhood is the greatest job woman can have. No amount of money can ever pay. From the smiles and hugs that you get from your children.Is it easy?



Happy Mothers day to all moms out there.!

 

 
 

This Is To All Mum Around The World

Is It Morally Okay To Teach Your Child About Sex Education?








Dear Readers/Visitors,


This is an e-mail from a parent who needs HELP ...I'd like parents here to help out. Please, give your advice/help.

 Please, i really need your views on this, i don't know if it's morally right to call your little girl or boy and start teaching him or her how to prevent unwanted pregnancy or STD's ? 
 I feel this is not right and I have been finding this very difficult to do. Please help me out!