Parenting Guide: Parenting Help for Special Needs Children

 
 By Noah B Brown

Children are always a blessing to their parents but it takes a lot of hard work to raise a happy, healthy and productive child to adulthood. That hard work seems to triple for those who are raising special needs children. It's more than a full-time job and there are days that make it seem like somebody set the clock ahead by several hours! Stop and breathe. There is parenting help available for those raising special needs kids.
Talk To Your Family
Your family can provide much support to you and your child. They can watch your children for a couple of hours to give you a little break and some time for yourself. If they've raised a special needs child, they very well might have parenting help tips to make your life easier.
Your Child's Doctor
A child's physician can be a great asset to those seeking parenting help for their special children. More than likely, he will have a variety of pamphlets and handouts offering advice on a range of child development stages. If you are experiencing a specific problem, he should be able to give you more detailed advice or suggest that you attend parenting classes. Either way, the Pediatrician is an option for advice on raising your child.
Parenting Classes
Many people begin to attend parenting classes as soon as they find out that they are expecting a baby. This is a wonderful idea but it is important that they remember that they will need to attend new classes for each of the child development stages. There are some parenting help facilities that offer parenting classes specifically for those raising special needs kids. For those who are having financial difficulties and would like to attend parenting classes but cannot afford to, there are free ones at many YMCAs, hospitals and local health departments.
Support Groups
Quite a few localities have support groups targeted for people with special needs kids. This is a great venue to obtain parenting help from others in the same situation. A support group will allow you to share your thoughts and feelings with others with similar circumstances. This helps every parent of a special needs child re-energize and cope with the trials and tribulations of life.
Support groups are also a good place to make new friends. You might even find someone in your own neighborhood that you can hang out with, especially if your children share child development stages. This would be a win-win situation as you and your special needs child will both have a new friend.
The Government
Believe it or not; many special needs children can receive financial help from the government. Of course, government aid will depend upon the severity of the child's disability as well as the family's income level. Although this is not technically parenting help, it is helpful for the parent to afford the necessities of raising a special needs child. These programs are worth looking into for your child.
Another option that isn't so much parenting help but is helpful is government health insurance, more commonly known as Medicaid. This is a program for low income families so that they have access to the medical care they need. Let's face it; medical care is very expensive as are health insurance premiums and co-payments. You might be pleasantly surprised to find that not only will your special needs child be covered by Medicaid but the rest of your family might be eligible too. This could truly be a good thing for your household budget and your financial well-being.

Noah Brown is a freelance writer who writes extensively on child parent relationships and offer parenting help to live a healthy, happy family life. She encourages her readers to watch motivating parenting videos which offer good parenting advice and teach kids to be good human beings and be successful.

Effective Parenting: How to Become a Better and an Insightful Parent - Learn How to Strike a Balance As a Child Caregiver?

By Anselm Anyoha

     Am so sure you want to become a better parent to children...Read this and i assure, you will be!

Every parent wants to be the best. This article will help you become a better and a more insightful parent. A well raised child is a win for the family and the society.

Parenting is challenging, especially to those who do not have earlier experience. There are cultural, social and geographical influences to styles of parenting. My experience, growing up in Nigeria, is that children tend to stay closer to families longer, compared to a western culture, like that of United States of America, where kids tend to assume independence at early age.

There are usually two main ways of raising children. One way, is to continuously control and safeguard them, and set cultural acceptable rules and standard of behavior. Parents who adopt this style run every facets of their kids life until way into their late teens, and perhaps into their early adult life.

This method of child nurturing is generational, and evolve from extended parental concern that their newborns are vulnerable to external factors and therefore need protection at all times. As such parents would never let their children venture out on their own until they have earned a certain level of maturity.

The downside to this technique is a tendency for over-parenting. Elements of over-parenting is seen when mothers or fathers wouldn't let their teenage children answer straightforward questions on their own. Excessive intrusion may create conflict between child and caregivers. Children who were excessively sheltered from direct life experience are often unprepared for expanded real life encounter.

The second style, the laissez-faire style, now trending, is for child caregivers to let their children slug to it out on their own, beginning at a very early age. These parents are brazen with their youngsters. You see some elements of laissez-faire parenting style when Infants are compelled to start toilet training at 6 months of age, or when toddlers are expected to prepare their own meals or, allowed to use public toilet without supervision.

The downside to the laissez-faire approach is under-parenting. Children who are left to venture out on their own at a very early age may learn the wrong ways of doing things. Bad behaviors ingrained in childhood may be hard to shake.

The effects of technology on family dynamics is mixed. On one side, because of availability of communication gadgets, members of a family can stay close even when they are physically apart. On the flip side, members of family have begun to be submerged in their own technology world, to the extent that they lose the emotional closeness that once existed within a family.

Strike a balance in your parenting skills

• Introduce your standard early. Child rearing starts early. When one establishes a feeding time, or a nursing time or a sleeping time, that is part of parenting. The child's growing brain is taking all that in, and expects continuation of the same pattern.
• Striking the right tone and balance is the way to go. At a certain point in a child's life, caregivers must let go, so that child can try learned experience and behaviors.
• Do not be rigid in your styles. Flexibility allows the child to experience alternative ways of doing things. Direct experience imparts a stronger impression on children's psyche.
• Each child learns and follows directions differently. Recognize that and adapt to each child's need.
• Give some leeway, but be there when needed. Children want the assurance that parents or other caregivers will be there for them when the need arises.
• Use incentive to your advantage. Be congratulatory when a child shows expected behavior. Everybody repeats behavior that attracts rewards and praise.
• Be reasonable. Development and maturity is biological. Do not push your children beyond what they are biological able to do. It creates frustration and resentment.
• The worst part of parenting is to give a child everything they ask for, and never willing to demand anything in return.

In conclusion

Parental supervision is invaluable in the sense that an experienced child caregiver knows what worked and what didn't work and can inculcate that wisdom into their children.

He is the Author of a new book: Automated Man, Thought Inheritance, And the Cycle of Existence. Check it out at: http://universetheorybook.com/

Effective Parenting Guide: How To Choose The Best Private Tutor For Your Child

By Stuart J Adams

For many parents trying to choose the right tutor, it can be a bit like choosing a car if you've never driven one before. You know you want one that's 'good' but it can be a bit confusing knowing how to judge what makes one good or not. Although there's plenty of 'user friendly' advice resources that first time car buyers can find online, finding someone to help you know how to choose the best tutor is a lot more difficult, even though the tutor you choose for your son or your daughter may well be a far more important decision that impacts their future than most others you will have to make. Your child's tutor is after all, not just another teacher; they will be your son or daughters own personal role model.

Why It's So Important To Choose The Right Tutor

Whether our kids are struggling with their confidence or just struggling with everything; parents who know their children well enough know full well, that the attitude they form towards their schoolwork will have the biggest impact on their performance. And the attitude they establish is largely determined by their surroundings.

You know how the class they are in at school has a big impact on how well they perform? A different teacher and a different group of classmates can make a big difference sometimes. Well consider that when we're talking a private one-on-one tutor, the difference here can be even bigger. If you get a tutor who does not understand the way your child learns best, who makes each lesson boring or tedious and does not make learning specifically relevant to your child, then the overall experience will be a negative one.

So if your son or daughter has already established a negative feel towards the areas they need more help, then this is the last thing you want. Get a tutor who has the ability to change the way your child thinks about and feels towards their schoolwork in a positive way however, and the rest will fall into place from there.

Are They A Teacher Or Just A Student?

Just like a first time car buyer might be looking for a car "that goes fast" or that is the right color  many parents who are uncertain what to look for in a tutor make the same common assumptions. The most common one is that a classroom school teacher makes the best tutor. Whilst a classroom teacher certainly would have some of the right experiences and understandings about learning and about classroom curriculum, not all school teachers make good tutors and not all great tutors are school teachers. It's a bit like the confused car owner looking for something safe, who buys a 4WD with the assumption that being a 4WD automatically makes it safer. In may be, but not necessarily. Having a better idea of what personal attributes to look for would put you in a far better position to make the right decision.

Personality - A Good Tutor Is A People Person

The most important personal attribute of any good tutor is the ability to communicate in a way that makes the learner feel motivated, enthusiastic and confident in their ability to master and enjoy whatever challenges come along. In other words, a good tutor must have good people skills, particularly when it comes to making learning fun and interesting for young students.

They must be able to explain complicated concepts in a way that 'makes sense' to their student, and must be able to do so in a way that inspires their student want to engage in what they are learning. No matter what the tutors qualifications, work experience or job title is, if they are not able to do that then they will fail your child.

Whilst many school teacher's and highly qualified professions are great at doing this, we have not found any significant correlation between these personal attributes and any specific qualifications. Instead, we do find significant correlations between these attributes and specific personality traits. For that reason, a good tutoring company will look at a tutors communication style and personality; not just the degrees they hold or the marks they achieved at school or university.

Should I Just Find Someone Privately?

You might be able to find a tutor who works in a 'sole trader' role in your local area. Just as buying a car from a private sale might be a bit cheaper than getting one through a reputable dealer with a warranty, finding someone operating as an individual for cash in hand jobs might be cheaper too, however there is also much less certainty about the reliability of who you're getting.

If you are going to find someone this way, it is still important to find out if they follow the above criteria by asking them what their approach to tuition is specifically. Depending on how much you value legitimacy and legal requirements, you might also wish to make sure that they have passed a working with children check, hold a valid liability insurance policy and that they're willing to provide you with invoices and other legitimate paperwork.

As a general rule, it is always better and more reliable to find a tutor employees by a reputable company. The question that parent's want answered therefore is how to know whether a particular company really does provide a good quality service, or whether they just look good on the surface. The following gives you some guidelines to know what to look for.

How To Differentiate A Good Tutoring Company From A Dud

The first way to tell is to have a look at their recruitment process, by pretending as though you are looking for work with that company as a tutor. Which criteria do they emphasize as being the most important? Do the seem more preoccupied with things that can be quantified on a piece of paper, or attributed that are qualified in a personality?

The second thing is to make sure that the company provides specific training to their tutors, and stipulates that their tutors follow a specified approach. If they don't, then basically all the company is doing is acting as a middleman, whilst sending you out a tutor to do whatever the tutor pleases. This is kind of like buying a car without knowing anything about the car that you're being sold, other than that it's a car that has passed the dealerships standards.

This is actually a common problem you will find among tutoring companies. The reason that they often do not provide specific training or required procedures to their tutors is because quite often, the tutors are sub contractors rather than employees. A company can't really require a sub contractor to follow company rules the same way an employee must. Sub contractors are cheaper to provide work to, which is why many tutoring companies do it this way. For this reason, always ask whether the tutor is an employee or a sub contractor, and if they are an employee; what kind of training to they receive and what kind of standards does the company require them to adhere to? If the company is confident in their own standards, they should have no problem providing you with specific details.

What Standards Are Important For A Tutoring Company

Specific Curriculum: Many tutoring companies have their own curriculum that their tutors are required to follow, irrespective of what areas the student needs specific help with and irrespective of what the student is doing at school during class. For students who are already achieving top marks at class and want to extend their skills, then this approach can be like 'cross training'. For students struggling in particular areas and want to do better in class, this approach tends to be confusing and overwhelm the student.

For this reason, make sure that the company specifies that their tutors take steps to ensure that they find our specifically what your child is doing in class, and follow their classroom curriculum. Make sure they also take steps to find out what your child needs specific help with, and is flexible enough to be able to focus on those areas.

Communication With School: The most effective way of doing this is when the tutor actually takes steps to communicate with the child's teacher(s) at school. If your tutor is able to form a good rapport with your child's school teacher, it is a great way to bridge the gap of communication between the home and the school. It helps the tutor know specifically what is going on in the classroom. If there are particular areas that your child's school teacher knows they need more assistance with that they do not have time for, they can just tell their tutor who can give them the added assistance they really need.

Because this is such a critical part of good tuition, you should not only insist that your child's tutor is willing to communicate with your child's school teacher, but that they are willing to initiate communication.

No Lock In Contracts: If you are not happy with your tutor, you should be under no obligation to continue with them, and only be charged for the lessons you have already had. Any company who wants to charge you up front fees or lock in contracts should be avoided. If the company knows that their employees are great tutors, there should be no need to do this.

Focus On Specific Skills: Ask about what specific skills the company's employees are required to focus on. Do they focus on computer skills as well as no computer skills, or is it only one or the other? Do they focus on specific confidence building strategies, or will they treat your child as an emotionless robot? Do they also provide opportunity to focus on assessment skills, higher order thinking skills and autonomous leaning skills? Do they specifically aim to find out what kind of learning styles your child is strongest in, or do they treat everyone as though they are the same?

Additional Support: A good tutoring company does more than just provide parents with a tutor. A good tutoring company cares about understanding each parents specific concerns, and aims to empower parents to know what they can do to support their children's learning needs. Check the companies website to see if they have a login section for parents, and find out what additional resources and support services they provide for parents specifically, or are they just a middleman?

For more resources and information on choosing the right Tutors Sydney, see the Home Tutoring Sydney website for more details.

Effective Parenting Guide: How To Prepare Your Child For Private Tutoring

By Stuart J Adams

Once you find the right tutor, it is very important to prepare your son or daughter to be in the right frame of mind so that they can get the best out of their tuition. After all, if you're going to go to the effort to make sure you've found the right tutor for them, you might as well take a few simple steps to ensure that they are ready to get the best results that they can.

There is no complicated procedure in place here; it basically comes down to making sure you speak about the idea of getting a tutor in a positive light, as though it were a reward or a special privilege. The first thing to be aware of is to make sure that you only ever speak to your child about the idea of tuition when they are in a positive state of mind. When you can see that they are already in a confident state, then is the best time to discuss the idea to get a great tutor.

Some questions you might try asking to 'warm them up' to the idea might include asking them about which teachers at school they like and don't like. When introducing the idea of a tutor, discuss the idea in a way so that it feels like a special privilege or reward, rather than a chore or a punishment. The ideal situation is where you manage to plant a seed of thought into your son or daughters mind about the excitement of having their own personal helper. If done in the right positive light, your child may even ask you or indicate that they want their own tutor. If the child feels that it is even partly their idea, then they are almost always going to have a much more positive response, and approach tuition with excitement rather than intimidation.

WHAT YOU CAN DO DO DURING THE LESSONS

Irrespective of your son or daughters expectations about meeting their new tutor for the first time, it is important that they see the experience as one that fosters encouragement, hope and excitement. It is common that even parents might feel a bit nervous about meeting a new tutor. It is important however that your child see you demonstrating a positive attitude both about your new tutor as well as to your new tutor.

To start off with, there are likely going to be lots of concerns that you'd like to discuss with the tutor. Please make sure that any 'problems' or anything at all that your child might feel insecure about are not discussed in front of them. You can always contact your tutor by phone or email to talk about these issues when your son or daughter is not present. We find that one of the most encouraging things is that when parents talk about something with the tutor that their child is proud of, whilst conversing in front of them. Even if it's not necessarily related to the areas the tutor will be covering, it is an important part of the process of getting your child to feel comfortable enough with their new tutor to 'open up' and get the most out of their tuition sessions.

WHAT YOU CAN DO AFTER THE LESSONS

It is important that the student feel a sense of 'control' over their situation, and that it is 'their tutor' not their parents tutor. As mentioned before, to get the best results, it is important to wait until your son or daughter is in a good mood before discussing anything about their tutor. When you find that they are in a positive state, it is best to ask questions about their tuition that are positively worded, or even open ended, so that they retain a sense of empowerment about the topic they are speaking about.

Examples of positively worded questions may be "so how good is it having your own tutor?" "What do you like best about your tutor?" and "What parts are starting to seem a bit easier now?" If your child seems a bit hesitant about how to respond, many parents report that using open-ended questions can be helpful so that they still feel a sense of empowerment, whereas close -ended questions can make them feel "backed into a corner."

HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE TO SEE RESULTS?

The answer to this question depends on what you're looking for. Imagine a person throws a handful of seeds in the soil with the intention of growing a tree. A short while later, one of the seeds have germinated and has started to grow into a shrub. The person looking on however does not see the tree they were expecting, and as a result abandoned their efforts before the tree had the chance to fully grow.

If your student has been struggling with a particular subject area, whether it be literacy, numeracy or even both; it's important you know how to judge whether or not 'it's working' by knowing what the signs of short term improvements are and what the signs of long term improvements are.

The first signs of improvement will generally take at least 4-8 lessons, and will manifest as a slight change in your child's attitude. The biggest hurdle to improving their skills is to first improve their confidence towards doing the things they previously believed they were no good at. Remember that it probably took many months or even years to establish the problematic mindset. If you start to see even small improvements in the way your child feels towards their schoolwork in as little as 4 -8 hours worth of tutoring, you can rest assure they are on the right track.

If you're not sure, the easiest way to tell is to pick up on subtle clues, such as their facial expressions and the tone in their voice when they are speaking about the subject. Most parents whose children go on to turn their weakness into their strengths, generally report that after the first 1-2 months, their children's attitude has gone from "I really don't like this" to at least "I'm not too keen on it but I'm not so bothered by it anymore." Then about 6 months down the track, their attitude is likely to evolve into "actually I don't mind this at all anymore" whilst the 12 month mark is likely to result in a greater expression of certainty. By the time a year is up, the student may or may not like the subject that was previously their Achilles heel, but at least the uncertainty they had about it previously will have worn away, to develop into, at very least, a comfortable understanding.

Whether or not your child is 'connecting' with their tutor is another important thing to ensure too. The best way to judge this is to see how your child appears in the hour or two leading up to the tutor's arrival. For the first few weeks, you might detect a bit of anxiety, however this may be because they are worries that they will 'disappoint' their new role model. The best way to tell if their tutor is not having much impact is when your child simply doesn't seem to care less about whether the tutor shows up or not. Any signs of anticipation, whether they be mild signs of excitement or even nervous signs of wanting to impress, are all an indication that your child is at least 'looking forward' to their arrival. If they look forward to their tutoring, they are more likely to be 'open' during the lesson, take more in and be motivated to want to get more out of it.

see the Top of the Class Tutoring Sydney website.